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What to do After Getting Engaged in 20 Simple Steps
Published Friday, Jan. 3rd, 2025
A step-by-step guide to help you celebrate, announce your engagement & start planning a wedding
Congratulations! You’re engaged! And if this is your first time getting married, you’re probably wondering what comes next.
Below are 20 simple steps to help you celebrate and start the planning process. We’re so excited for you!
A Simple Guide for What to do After Getting Engaged
Wondering what to do when you're engaged? Keep scrolling for helpful advice on your next steps.
1. Savor this Moment: YOU GOT ENGAGED!
Take some time just for the two of you to celebrate this momentous milestone! You’ve agreed to take the ultimate leap of love, and it’s totally ok to savor the moment with each other privately before you share the news with the world.
Of course, if you feel like you’ll burst if you don’t shout it from the rooftops immediately, that’s ok too! Which leads us too…
2. Tell the People Closest to You First
Wondering how to announce your engagement? Start with those closest to you: Call your bestie! Call your parents and grandparents! Text photos of your engagement ring to everyone at the top of your contact list and share the happy news! If your sweetie managed to get a few proposal pictures or a proposal video, share those with your closest loved ones too. This is good news and the people who love you most want to celebrate with you!
3. Engagement Ring Selfies & Social Media Posts
Now that the people closest to you have heard the news, it’s time to share your engagement announcement with the world – with some cute engagement ring selfies! Head to social media to share the excitement with friends near and far.
Wondering how to announce engagement news, but still take some time to yourself? You can share the news as slowly or as quickly as you want to, just make sure you and your partner are on the same page. It might make sense to tell your closest friends and family before posting on social media or telling work friends - but who you tell and how you share the news is totally up to you. (Photo: Prostock-Studio / iStock)
4. Insure Your Engagement Ring (or Rings)
If you splurged for an expensive engagement ring or rings, it’s important to insure them as soon as possible. This might not seem romantic, but trust us, it’s one of those things you’ll be incredibly grateful for should the day come that you need it. Just like other types of insurance, engagement ring insurance can save you money and upset down the road. We’ve heard plenty of lost engagement ring stories over the years, so don’t skip this step!
5. Resize Your Engagement Ring (or Rings)
If your ring fits perfectly, you’re all set! But if you need to get it sized, now’s the time! Resizing is a wonderful way to make a family heirloom ring or vintage engagement ring fit snugly and comfortably.
A well-fitted ring makes it more comfortable to wear every day, and harder to lose. You want your engagement ring to show off, not fall off!
Getting your ring resized is easy: You’ll visit a jeweler, who will take measurements of your finger and then make adjustments to your ring band. If your ring is too big, they’ll cut and remove a small part of the band. If the ring is too small, they’ll cut the band and add a small amount of metal to increase the size.
How long does it take to resize an engagement ring?
Resizing a ring takes anywhere from an hour to several days – but don’t worry, you won’t be without your ring for long.
How much $ does it cost to get an engagement ring resized?
On average, you'll pay between $50 to $150 to get a ring resized. If you can afford it, this step should be done as soon as possible.
6. Decide on an Approximate Wedding Date
One of the first parts of wedding planning is to choose a wedding date. But you don’t have to start with an exact date right off the bat, unless you already have a special date in mind – like an anniversary, ‘lucky’ wedding date (based on numerology), or favorite holiday.
Related: Learn how to pick a wedding date using numerology with Marriage by the Numbers
Instead, we think it’s helpful to choose a rough wedding date, or range of dates, to start with. For example, ‘Fall of 2026,’ or ‘the last two weeks of May 2025.’ This way, you can give people a general idea of when to expect your wedding (and build excitement), without committing to a set date. Having a flexible date can make it easier to book your dream wedding venue and vendor when the time comes, especially if they’re in high demand.
Here are a few resources to help you choose a lucky wedding date/s:
A little flexibility can go a long way when picking a wedding date, but be sure to choose a date that's special to you. Booking venues and vendors might be less competitive and less expensive during 'off-season' wedding dates; on the other hand, popular times like Valentine's Day, New Year's Eve, Halloween, three-day weekends, and Fall wedding dates are very romantic! (Photo: Prostock-Studio / iStock)
7. Pose for Professional Engagement Photos
An engagement photo shoot is fun way to share the news that you’re getting married, and to capture your unique energy and dynamic as a couple. These photos can be romantic, playful, outdoorsy, elegant, and anything in between.
If you hire a professional photographer, an engagement photo session might be included as part of a full wedding photo package. You can also hire a photographer just for an engagement shoot, or recruit a friend or relative with a creative eye.
For ideas on what to wear for engagement photos, check out:
8. Relax and Take a Break
Take a minute to breathe and really enjoy this exciting time. It’s so easy to get caught up in the whirlwind of wedding planning, but remember that this should all be fun, too! Take a step back as often as you need to reconnect with your partner, shake off any stress, and get reinspired about your upcoming wedding (and the happy years ahead – that’s what this is all really about, after all!).
9. Start Gathering Wedding Ideas & Inspiration
Find inspiration in wedding magazines, Instagram and TikTok posts, and Pinterest boards. The possibilities are endless (even if your wedding budget isn’t…). Search online for examples of themed wedding ideas you might enjoy, and current wedding trends that might spark inspiration. Keep all your favorite images and ideas in one place so that it’s easier to sort through them when it’s time to start planning and purchasing items for the big day.
Keep all your wedding ideas and inspiration in one or two places to make it easier to narrow down your choices as time goes by. Consider a wedding planner notebook, binder, or digital tools to stay organized. (Photo: Rawpixel / iStock)
10. Research Wedding Venues & Locations
Unless you already have a special wedding venue in mind (like one of these unique and unusual wedding venues), it’s time to start researching your options! Do you want to get married in town or travel somewhere special? Do you want to get married indoors or outdoors? Do you want a sleek, modern venue, or a space that’s steeped in history and romance?
This is your opportunity to learn the average cost of wedding venues in your area, which will be very useful when you start discussing and finalizing your wedding budget. For most couples, the wedding venue cost is about 40% of the total wedding budget – so keep this in mind while researching.
Pro tip: Did you know you can usually take a tour of the wedding venues you’re considering? Visit the space to scope out the size, lighting, and overall ‘feel’ before you put down a deposit.
11. Talk About Your Wedding Budget
Money, money, money! Talk to your partner about how much you want to (and can afford to) spend on the wedding day. Although the average wedding cost in the US is a staggering $35,000 these days, the median cost of a wedding is about $18,500. This means that half of all couples spend less than $18,500 on their wedding, and many couples spend much less. All of this is to say that you can have a beautiful wedding on any budget, just by working creatively with what you have!
Once you have a budget in mind, determine how long it will take you to save up for the wedding you want, and how much debt (if any) you’re comfortable taking on. Make adjustments as needed!
Pro tip: It's helpful to set aside some uninterrupted time to talk about the budget, instead of trying to fit in it while doing other things (like running errands or doing chores). An intentional approach with fewer distractions can keep you focused and calm. So grab a cup of tea, a snack, and a spreadsheet, and get to it!
Use this breakdown of the average wedding cost to get started:
12. Take a Day Off to Have Fun & Celebrate Your Progress
Talking about money and making long term plans can be stressful, even for the most level-headed and in-love couples. Take a day off to enjoy each other’s company and celebrate how far you’ve come together.
You’re about to get into the logistics part of wedding planning, so take some time to reset, recharge, and remember how exciting this is.
13. Start a Wedding Checklist & Timeline
It’s best to start planning the details of your wedding day about 9 to 14 months out from your wedding date. This gives you plenty of time to interview wedding vendors, book the perfect wedding venue, find your wedding dress or suit, and notify friends and family who will be traveling from out of town.
Your wedding checklist breaks down the most important parts of wedding planning into smaller manageable ‘to do’ items. Here are a couple of resources to help you get started:
14. Choose Your Wedding Party (Wedding Attendants)
Will you have bridesmaids or groomsmen at your wedding? A maid or honor, or best man? How about a ‘mate of honor,’ ‘best mate,’ or ‘honor attendant,’ for gender neutral roles?
Related: Bridesmen and Groomsmaids: Tips for Planning an Unconventional Wedding Ceremony
Before you ask loved ones to be part of your wedding party, make sure you talk with your partner about how many attendants you’ll each have and who you have in mind. Discuss whose responsibility it would be to purchase matching formal wear or bridesmaids’ dresses (yours or theirs?), travel expenses, hair and makeup and other costs. And who pays for the bachelorette party? After all, the average cost of being a bridesmaid was about $1,800 in 2023!
And remember – you don’t have to have a wedding party. Some couples find that choosing wedding attendants just complicates the process. It’s up to you!
Related: Matron of Honor vs Maid of Honor (& Why You Need BOTH!)
Do you want a large wedding with several bridesmaids and groomsmen? Before you ask friends or relatives to help out, alk to your partner about who you want in your wedding party, how many attendants each of you will have, and who will be expected to pay for the necessary items. (Photo: FG Trade / iStock)
15. Outline Your Wedding Guest List
By now, you might have a general idea of how big you want your wedding to be and how much money you have to spend. With this in mind, start drafting your guest list. Having a general idea of how many people will be there on the wedding day can help you finalize your venue choice and location, and make any needed adjustments to your wedding budget.
Pro tip: If you need to keep the wedding ceremony small because of budget or venue restraints, consider throwing a large reception party afterwards, where everyone you know and love can come to celebrate.
16. Ask a Friend or Relative to Officiate Your Wedding
Does one guest stand out among the rest? Consider asking a close friend or relative to do the honors of officiating your wedding ceremony!
Your chosen wedding officiant might be a parent, grandparent, favorite teacher, beloved neighbor, or best friend. The best officiant will be someone that holds a special place in your relationship, and that both of you feel comfortable with and supported by.
Once you have that special officiant in mind, pop the question! You can ‘propose’ to them with a “Will You Marry Us?” gift box, or consider one of these sweet ways to ask someone to officiate your wedding.
Friends and relatives can get ordained online free to officiate a wedding with American Marriage Ministries, and then use one of our popular wedding ceremony scripts to read on the big day. Click the links below to get started!
- Get Ordained Online with AMM
17. Build a Wedding Website (Registry Optional)
A wedding website helps you keep all the details of your big day in one place, making it easy for friends and family members to keep track of what’s happening. Add links to your wedding registry, include a wedding RSVP form, venue address and day-of itinerary, share your engagement photos, and more!
Some of the most popular wedding website platforms to use are The Knot, Zola, Wedding Wire, WedSites, Wix, and Squarespace. Many of these options will also help you create wedding checklists, suggest vendors, and help with budgeting.
Click the link below to read about some of the best wedding registry websites:
Wedding websites are a 'hub' of information for your family and friends to help them stay up to date on your wedding plans. (Photo: milindri / iStock)
18. Start Interviewing Planners & Wedding Vendors
Popular wedding vendors include: wedding planner, wedding photographer and videographer, wedding officiant / marriage officiant, caterer, day-of coordinator, florist, baker, makeup and hair artists, transportation staff (limo drivers, etc); wedding DJ, and musicians.
Decide which of these talented folks you want helping out on your wedding day, and how much you have to spend on their services. Read online reviews, browse social media posts and online portfolios, and look for vendors that are experienced with the type of wedding experience you want. Then reach out and ask any questions you have, including questions about rates and availability.
Related: Three tips for planning a WTF (Wedding that Fits) Wedding Celebration
19. Have an Engagement Party (or Two)
You can have your engagement party at any time, even before you have a wedding date! So if you’ve been scrolling this list wondering when you get to toast fancy cocktails while walking around showing off your ring – this is it, and any time is a good time!
Engagement parties are usually casual, and there aren’t a lot of ‘rules’ for how to throw one. The main considerations are: Do you want to plan your own or have a friend or relative plan it for you? Will there be an engagement registry for gifts? (If so, you’ll want to set that up early so that your guests have time to choose a gift.) Will you celebrate in a venue or at home? Do you want a dressed-down or dressed-up party?
It’s considered good etiquette to invite everyone at your engagement party to your wedding, so keep this in mind when planning the guest list. Inviting everyone to both events isn’t required, however. If you’re planning a small wedding, elopement, or destination wedding, the engagement party is a great chance to celebrate with all your friends and family before the big day.
20. Enjoy the Excitement of Being Engaged!
We’ve said it before and we’ll say it again – don’t lose sight of why you’re doing all this, and don’t forget to have fun! YOU’RE GETTING MARRIED! Your marriage will be filled with more parties, more friends and family, more celebrations and milestones. This is just the start of many things to come, so enjoy it!
Congratulations on your engagement! (Photo: ilbusca / iStock)
More Engagement Ideas & Inspiration
- 7 Ultimate Engagement Gifts To Make a Couple’s Wedding Planning a Breeze
- 5 Ways to Help an Engaged Friend Get Ready for the Wedding Day
- 5 Creative Engagement Ring Alternatives
Browse all Engagement Ideas
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Ask a Friend to Officiate Your Wedding!
Good things happen when friends and relatives help out at the wedding ceremony! Ask a friend or family member to officiate your wedding with free online ordination through American Marriage Ministries (AMM).
|* custom-button, "https://theamm.org/ordination-application", "ORDAINED MINISTER ONLINE APPLICATION" *|
Why AMM? American Marriage Ministries is an inclusive nondenominational internet church that ordains and trains ministers to officiate marriage ceremonies. We are a recognized 501(c)(3) nonprofit church, and help people from all backgrounds and beliefs become ordained ministers for weddings. Our online ordination is free, accessible, and never expires.
Officiating weddings is an incredible honor, and a great way to show your love and support for the people getting married. As a wedding officiant, you will help to create memorable ceremonies and memories that last a lifetime.
AMM Ministers can legally officiate weddings in every state* (it's much harder in Virginia, where we're looking into our options). After getting ordained with AMM, you might need to register your ordination with your local county clerk’s office. Click the link above to get started!
Become an ordained minister online with American Marriage Ministries and officiate wedding for friends and relatives. (Photo cropped: Biserka Stojanovic / iStock)
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