Does the Officiant Get a Wedding Invitation? Etiquette for the Reception & More

Ask AMM: “Do you send a wedding invitation to the officiant?” 

 

We recently had an engaged couple ask us this question, and we love it for a few different reasons! Here’s a quick look at what to consider when sending out wedding invites, a crash course in wedding invite etiquette, and our favorite way to ask an officiant to perform your wedding ceremony.

 

First, we just have to say how much we love this question because, as wedding officiants ourselves, we know the officiant plays such a big part on the wedding day, and that things can get really hectic for couples as the big day approaches. It’s an honor to be asked to officiate, and it's really touching to know that couples are thinking about us and want us to feel appreciated.

 

So before we dive in, thank you for asking this question – consider our hearts warmed on this chilly winter day!

 

Now let’s take a look at the details!

 

Do You Invite the Officiant to the Wedding? And Do They Stay for the Reception?

 

Here’s the Scoop

 

1. Do you send a wedding invitation to the officiant? 

 

If you want your wedding officiant to stay for your wedding reception, then by all means give them an official invitation! This is a sweet gesture and your invitation will make for a memorable keepsake of the day.

 

If you only want your officiant at your ceremony and not at the dinner table or on dance floor, sending an invitation is not necessary (more on this below!).

 

Of course, now you probably have a new question – does the officiant usually stay for the reception? And is it rude to invite them – or to not invite them? Keep reading, we’ve got you covered!

 

Related: Creative Save the Date Wording & Designs for Your Wedding

 

 

2. Does the wedding officiant stay for the reception?

 

Does the wedding officiant stay for the reception? There’s no hard and fast rule on this, and your decision to extend an invitation will depend on the type of officiant who marries you and your relationship with them. 

 

If a relative or close friend officiates your wedding this is an easy choice – there’s no doubt your loved one is staying for dinner, drinks, and dancing! 

 

Related: 5 Great Reasons to Ask a Friend to Officiate Your Wedding

 

Many couples invite a beloved rabbi or priest who marries them to stay for the reception, especially if this clergy member is someone that they see often, or someone who’s ministered to the family for many years. On the other hand, if the party’s going to be wild enough that you can’t risk a priest there to witness it, or if your budget can’t handle an extra guest, it’s ok not to extend an invite. This type of officiant will likely be very honored to receive an invitation, but probably won’t expect one.

 

Hired professional officiants often receive an invitation too, if a couple’s budget permits, but this isn’t mandatory. If you connected on a personal level with your officiant and have been working together for several months, by all means invite them! But don’t feel obligated to – trends are changing and it’s becoming more common not to invite this type of officiant to the party. Whatever you decide, remember that it’s not personal if a professional officiant can’t make it to your reception – some officiants will have another ceremony booked after yours, and others might want to keep work and socializing separate for professional reasons. 

 

If you don’t want your officiant to attend the reception, or can't afford it, that’s ok! You don’t need to give them an official wedding invitation. In this case, we think there’s a much more fun way to ask your officiant to attend the ceremony – which we describe in the next section. 

 

Related: Choosing a Wedding Officiant: What (or Who) Are Your Options?

 

 

3. Skip the invite with a fun way to ask someone to officiate your wedding…

 

Ask someone to officiate your wedding with a sweet ‘proposal’! 

 

The ‘Will You Marry Us?’ gift box in the AMM Store is our favorite way to ask a friend or relative to perform a wedding, and it comes with everything your chosen officiant needs to marry you. 

 

This gift box is a great choice if this is someone’s first time officiating a wedding, or if they’ll be officiating in a new state, or if they want to write a custom ceremony for you. 

 

It includes an official Ordination Certificate, Letter of Good Standing, minister licensing instructions (where required), a step-by-step guide book on planning a custom wedding ceremony, the AMM Minister manual, and more. 

 

Related: How to Ask Someone to Officiate Your Wedding - Our Favorite Way to Say 'Will You Marry Us?'

 

 

4. Does the Officiant Get a Plus-One to the Wedding Reception? 

 

So you’ve decided you want your officiant at the wedding reception – cheers! We know they’ll appreciate the invite and the chance to celebrate with you. But should you give them a plus-one? Do you need to budget for one extra guest, or two? 

 

Inviting the Officiant's Spouse to Wedding Reception:

 

This situation isn’t as straightforward as it might seem, and again, it will depend on the type of officiant who marries you and your relationship with them. 

 

If a close friend or relative officiates your wedding, accommodate them in the same way you do your other guests: If other guests are given a plus-one, then yes! Absolutely, your friend-officiant should also have a plus one.  

 

If your officiant is a beloved clergy member, and they are married or in a long-term partnership, it’s good etiquette to extend a plus-one for their spouse. If they are single, a plus-one isn’t mandatory.

 

If you hire a professional officiant, there are no strict guidelines for offering a plus-one. Your choice depends on how close you feel to them after working together, whether or not they’re married themselves, and your wedding budget. 
 

 

5. "Do I tip the wedding officiant even if they're invited to reception?" 

 

Last but not least: If you've decided to invite the wedding officiant to your reception, should you also tip them for their services? 

 

We suggest yes, tipping your wedding officiant is always good idea, even if you've already invited them to your reception party to show thanks. 

 

What counts as a good tip? Here's our previous advice on when and how to tip a wedding officiant, taken from How Much Does a Wedding Officiant Cost? (& Should You Tip Them?):

 

"If a friend is officiating your wedding for free, we recommend you thank them for their time and effort with a small monetary tip or gift...

 

Most professional wedding officiants accept (but don't expect) tips... If you’d like to give your officiant a gift instead of a cash tip, check out these great suggestions: Gift Ideas for Your Wedding Officiant.

 

And at the very least, always leave your wedding officiant a great review online if you’re happy with their services." 

 

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If you’re close with your officiant, give them a shout-out by name on your wedding invitations!

 

Include Your Officiant on Your Wedding Invitations:
A Special Way to Say ‘Thank You’

 

This article includes advice on how to honor the unique role your wedding officiant serves on the wedding day – by giving them a ‘shout out’ on your wedding invitations! Check out our wedding invitation templates, with creative designs and simple wording suggestions to inspire you. This is a great way to say ‘thank you!' for officiating!

 

• Read the full article here

 

 

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More Wedding Planning Ideas & Advice

 

• A Simple Wedding Planning Checklist & Timeline for Busy Couples
   
• This Wedding Planning Book Uses Numerology for a ‘Marriage by the Numbers’!
   
• 10 Wedding Reminders For Real Couples From an Officiant’s Perspective
   
• Three tips for planning a WTF (Wedding that Fits) Wedding Celebration
   

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