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The Anonymous Officiant: Top Hat & Actual Tails for This Bridal Beagle

Published Monday, May. 8th, 2023

Forget bridesmaids and groomsman, say 'I do' with your Best Beagle beside you!



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AMM Audio Articles · The Anonymous Officiant: Top Hat & Actual Tails for This Bridal Beagle





"A young woman who wanted her long-time companion beagle included in her wedding ceremony approached me – somebody had suggested she ask her wedding officiant whether or not they’d have any objections to the presence of a 'bridal beagle.’

The bride’s rationale was that the beagle had been there for her -- and with her -- for almost every important occasion of her life, and the bride-to-be didn't see why she should lock away her best friend on such a big day.



My advice to any couple wanting to include a pet in their wedding ceremony is to ask these questions: 

1. Has the fur baby had his or her shots, and is he or she in reasonably good health? 

2. Does the fur baby mind crowds, and is he or she friendly?

3. Can somebody else assume complete responsibility for your fur baby after the ceremony, or is there time enough between the wedding and the reception to take the fur baby back home again? 

4. And probably most important of all, will the venue you have selected for your wedding permit your fur baby to enter the premises?



Illustration of a a dog at a wedding ceremony wearing a top hat and a jacket with bowtie, in the distance the bride and groom embrace. Drawing shows the couple's legs in the distance with the beagle in the foreground. Illustration by Jessica Levey.

Illustration by Jessica Levey



As an officiant with a multitude of weddings behind me, I can say in all honesty that I have never had a poodle get tipsy and pass out in the lobby of the hotel right before the pictures were to be taken. 

Not once has a Persian cat exposed a risqué tattoo with her low-cut gown. 

And I have never, ever had to retrieve a retriever from the back of the altar, where he was playing with the matches meant to light the unity candle…

In fact, almost any pet at all is easier to fold gracefully into a ceremony than a two-year old human ring-bearer with jet lag, no nap, and a loaded Pull-Up.

If most of your answers are "yes" to these questions, then this officiant has no objections whatsoever to including Mittens or Rowdy."


– Anonymous 





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Are you the next Anonymous Officiant?


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Hey, Wedding Officiants! Share your real wedding story, rant, or advice anonymously in The Anonymous Officiant.  


We’re accepting submissions of true stories, confessions, rants, and other revelations from the wild world of officiating. Do you have a secret, a cautionary tale, a wedding day disaster story, or exciting gossip? A true tale that's funny, heartwarming, scandalous, surprising, or informative? Something you want to confess, or get off your chest? 


Your secret’s safe with us! Submit a story or advice in 500 words or less to [email protected] or use the anonymous submission form linked below. 


Read our Submission Guidelines



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