Step 3 - Collaborate With The Couple

This wedding ceremony is about and for the couple. Even though you will be doing the lion's share of the writing, you should never loose sight of this fact.

Consulting with the couple early on is an essential part of the ceremony writing process. After talking to them you will have a better idea as to the tone, theme, length, and rituals involved in the wedding ceremony.

Set up a meeting with the couple, or start an email chain. Things to ask them include:

• Are there any special rituals they want in the ceremony such as a sand ceremony or handfasting?
  • This will give you more definition in the type of wedding ceremony you will be writing.
• Are there any other people involved in the ceremony? Children? Family? Friends?
  • Often times the couple will want to include a flower girl in the ring exchange or have another friend do a poetry reading.
• Have they chosen a wedding venue? Is there a personal significance to this space?
  • Maybe the couple has chosen the place they first met, or their favorite park. This is useful information to include in the ceremony to make it more resonant with the couple.
• Is there anything else they would like to share regarding the ceremony?
  • Feel free to ask for anything that will help further define your writing assignment. Are they going to have a vows exchange? Is there a particular theme to the wedding? Do they want you to acknowledge their parents, and so on.

Having this dialog will also likely inspire new ideas that none of you would have thought of individually. Make sure to stay focused on what is relevant to the ceremony and take notes. Afterwards, confirm which ideas the couple wants to include in the actual ceremony. Plenty of ideas will have been tossed about and it will save you time if you know for sure which ones to develop and which ones to discard.