Bobbiejo Winkler-Hanson

I just copy and pasted, our written document

Alysse & Vincent

Aspyn

Scout & Silvia

08/20/2022

Welcome Statement/Introduction

Opening Remarks [AKA:announcements]

Smile

Ladies and gents, we’re here today because Alysse and Vincent have said to one another, “Honey, I love you so much let’s get the government involved!”

Seriously, though. Thank you all so much for joining us. Alysse and Vincent have asked that this be a relaxed ceremony, so we’re here to have a good time while we get this hitching done, then we’ll all have more fun when we get to the reception.

Here are three things, you- the guests- need to know before we start –

1. “The couple have asked that we not take any photos, so please put all your cameras and phones away.” Please turn your phones on silent mode.

2. Please remain standing when asked to “please rise”

3.After the I dos, we ask that you please excuse yourselves from bride to groom, taking turns. You will join the Newlyweds out there before we all meet for the dinner. I will excuse the 1st row. On your way to greet them, please stop and contribute your sand.

This thing isn’t going to start itself, so let’s get to it!

Let them hear you, now! Are you ready for the wedding of Alysse and Vincent?” {MoG gets Vincent up to the altar}

The music starts, and here we go.

Processional

This is the part where the wedding party walks down the aisle and takes their places for the ceremony.

SONG:__________________________________

Seat mother of the Bride

Seat mother of the Vincent {instead Bobbiejo places Vincent at the altar}

Nate and Harley Nate does arm tap shake

Brett and Savannah Brett does Handshake shoulder hug

Dylan? Ann  Dylan does full hug

Dad Jordan brings Ring Security >Drennan down aisle

Mom Bobbiejo brings flower girl > Aspyn down the aisle

Bobbiejo takes her place behind alyssesmaids

As the music goes out, ask guests to please rise

Next song begins,

Alysse and Dad walk down the aisle. They stand as music gradually tapers down

SONG:__________________________________

The Officiants Opening Remarks

"Today is a day to breathe a big sigh of relief,

and give a huge shout of joy –

because at least two of us here ----

have finally found someone to spend the next thirty years-

curling up on the couch next to,

with a plate of Steak, potatoes & corn, while watching rush hour

It’s what we’ve all been looking for,

and ALYSSE and VINCENT have managed to find it.

In a world with so many people –

and yet so few who actually get us on a deep, lasting level –

this is absolutely ---

worthy of our celebration and support.

Officiant:

Will you who are present here today,

surround Alysse and Vincent in love,

offering them the joys of your friendship,

and supporting them in their marriage?

All: We will

Officiant: You may be seated.

[Pause until its quieted]

The giving of the bride

___- “Doubly blessed is the couple which comes to the marriage altar

with the approval and blessings of their families and friends.

Her mother

___- Today, we choose not to give away Alysse, but to share her with Vincent for the rest of our lives.

Who has the honor of presenting this woman, as she is married to this man?”

to which __stepdad__of Bride and mom will answer “I do”

OPENING PRAYER

“Lord, in your providence,

you have provided the family

as a place where people can experience love,

learn important life lessons

and find encouragement.

May your design be reflected in this new family.

I pray that you would unite and bind this family together.

Even in togetherness, may there be space to be individuals.

Help each person to love, respect

and encourage others within the family.

May the care and hospitality within the family

be extended to those outside,

so that others might see your presence.”

AMEN

Welcome

*it’s a blessing to be here today, Supporting these two and holding them up,

It’s about growing up together, over and over, and these two are in it for the long run!"

"That’s right, let's revel in the miracle of these two loveable,

late-night-snack -loving misfits finding each other!"

Welcome to Murrays on main, theeeee meeting place.

When I met with alysse and Vincent, 1 of my questions was,

tell me the story of why you chose your venue.

Simultaneously their response was, It was cheap,

I prompted, I need more than that, Alysse replies it’s a happy place.

More prompting, Why happy?

You are all sitting in the place where they first officially met & chose each other. They have chosen all of you to witness, the beginning of their next chapter

*********

We hold marriage up as a tradition in this country,

and we’ve debated over it a lot in the last few decades,

but at the end of the day, why do we do it?

I made the joke in the intro about loving each other so much we’re going to get the government involved,

but is that all it really is? Aside from the tax breaks?

Of course not!

It’s a tradition, yes, but we change traditions all the time,

and we keep the essence of those traditions alive in their new forms.

So nowadays marriage isn’t what it used to be

when Ralph Kramden (Honeymooners) promised to knock his loving wife Alice

“Straight to the moon!” night after night in the fifties –

Vincent you’re definitely not allowed to do that.

At all.

And neither are you, Alysse.

Nobody is allowed to knock anybody straight to the moon,

no matter how hairy things get.

CONTINUED>>>>>>>>

Ahh… There it is. The crux of why we do this marriage thing.

Sure, it’s a lot of work.

Sure it takes a lot of compromise.

But at the end of the day, when you’re married,

you’ve got someone to come home to.

You’ve got someone who’s promised to love you

(Insert 1 pet peeve, for bride and groom)

no matter how many dirty dishes you leave laying in the bedroom,

or no matter how smelly the laundry is from not being switched,

or no matter what the universe decided to drop on your head this week.

After a while, you’ll find you’ve even got someone you share a little inside language with.

We do marriage because it helps to have someone around- to walk through life with.

Alysse and Vincent will mark their transition as a couple not only by celebrating the love between themselves, but by also celebrating the love between all of us—including the love of their furbabies, scout and silvia, who are unable to make it today.

Without all of that love, today would be far less joyous.

*******(reading that includes dogs)

Love makes messes. Love leaves you little surprises here and there. Love needs lots of cleaning up after. Sometimes you just want to get love fixed. Sometimes you want to roll up a piece of newspaper and swat love on the nose, not so much to cause pain, just to let love know: Don’t you ever do that again!… But love makes you meet people wherever you go. People who have nothing in common but love, stop and talk to each other on the street. Throw things away and love will bring them back, again, and again, and again. But most of all, love needs love, lots of it. And in return, love loves you and never stops.

Gathering Words

NO MIC JUST FOR ME TO THEM-

--> my take They wanted my own surprise joke to lighten the moment, it was perfect-->

“Alysse and Vincent,before I really start,

I'd like you to turn to face each other.

{look into each others eyes}

WHISPER

You're now looking into the eyes of the person, who is statistically most likely to murder you.”

Declaration of Intent

Vincent Winkler do you come here on your own free will, and do you freely chose to marry Alysse Thompson Today

Alysse Thompson, do you come here on your own free will, and do you freely chose to marry Vincent Winkler Today

It is your duty, to be to each other

a considerate, tender, faithful, and loving companion

to support, guide and cherish the other in prosperity and trouble;

to constantly show your affection, KEEP DATING

to shelter the other from danger, and to love one another with an unchangeable love.

You do this to make your marriage the very best that it can be.

I call your attention to the seriousness of the decision which you have made and the covenant you are about to declare before everyone here today and God. The vows you are about to take are not to be taken without careful thought,

for in them you are committing yourselves exclusively to one another

for as long as you both shall live.

A successful marriage is not something that just happens.

It takes work, it takes patience, and it takes time.

It takes a commitment from both of you…

a commitment to do whatever it takes to make your relationship

thrive and not just simply survive.

Skip Readings & Charge to Couple

Exchange of Vows

Say ditto to the other if you agree- when I say your name you repeat after me

V: I promise to listen, _/_especially when it’s hard, _/_because that’s when I most need_/_ to hear what you have to say.

A: I promise to notice the gifts you give me_/_ and to appreciate them: _/_your kisses, your kindness, _/_your patience, your humor, _/_your effort.

V: I promise to take care of myself _/_and let you help take care of me. _/_ I promise to encourage you to take care of yourself_/_ and help take care of you however I can.

A: I vow to be honest. _/_I will be honest with my actions and my words. _/_. I will be straightforward and tell you_/_ when I am in need of your presence, _/_your love, your support, and your honesty.

BOTH: I vow to learn from my mistakes, to grow from our struggles.

I vow to be your partner, half of a team, working toward the same goal: happiness, together

WEDDING PARTY PROMISES

CONTINUED>>>>>>>>>>>

--> my take on this next part was uncertain until it happened. This made a whole lot of comedic fun energy.-->

(Best man makes bride repeat after him,

MOH Makes groom repeat after her)

Fist bump, sure, alright I guess, or high five

______ Alysse repeat:I promise not get angry when you don’t put your dishes in the sink.

______ Vincent repeat:I promise not to get upset when you use the elliptical as a coat hanger

______ Alysse repeat:I promise to not complain when you go golfing all day with your friends, but I don’t promise that I won’t let you forget it

______ Vincent repeat: "I promise to love you, honor you, but not obey because that’s a little creepy.”

"AND I promise to blame you when I flake on plans. Because I totally want to go!"

______ Vincent repeat:Do you promise to let Alysse rein you in at the gun store, because you probably have enough guns, / for now?

______ Alysse repeat:Do you promise to let Vincent rein you in at the book store, because you probably have enough books, / for now?

***************give them cue response

Do you both promise to be supportive of each other as individuals,

never trying to change the other;

to support and encourage,

and give all that you’ve got to give

to make each other’s dreams come true?

Until death do you part?

VINCENT & ALYSSE REPLY To infinity and beyond

-->this was with grooms 3 year old daughter and went beautiful-->

Sand ceremony-FAMILY UNITY

***Children are like a whiteboard

Children are like a whiteboard, what you write & draw,

others will see your design and learn from you.

Alysse, stepparents are not around to replace a biological parent,

rather to augment a child's life experience, it is not your job to raise her.

it's your blessing to be her friend even when she dislikes you.

(trust me the teen years will be here soon enough)

you aren't her disciplinarian, you are her adviser,

guiding her to be her own best person.

And guiding her on the path her parents have set for her

Daddy it is your job to help guide them,

So they keep solid ground between one other,

ensuring they always show respect to one another,

and helping them to give one another positivity.

Today this relationship is symbolized through the pouring of the sand

Allyse Do you agree that if a child lives with something- that’s what they learn.

TO GUESTS

To all of you, may I see a show of hands for anyone who has been a step parent,

now please, keep your hands up for a moment -if you are open to Alysse leaning on you for support and advice

if she struggles with her new role.

(Bride look around)

--> that was added surprise for bride, she appreciated it

(Daddy help her) Aspyn, can you pour some white to represent your whiteboard.

White also represents innocence

If a child lives with something they learn that for life,

now if you used a black permanent marker on a whiteboard

that’s harder to remove than colorful dry erase markers.

Alysse Pick up and pour in black

if you promise to give Aspyn any of the following

criticism -she’ll learn to condemn

Hostility she’ll learn to fight

Ridicule she’ll learn to be shy

Shame she’ll learn to feel guilty

 Now,Alysse- with Aspyn’s help, and Vincent’s guidance

pour in each representing color,

as your promise to give one another the following

Brown Tolerance > learn to be patient

Blue encouragement > learns confidence

Green praise > to appreciate

Red for fairness > learns Justice

Coral security > have faith

Orange approval > to Like herself

(Vincent help tip it all in)

Yellow acceptance and friendship > she will find love in the world

Vincent, please pour half of the orchid to represent your promise to Alysse -- to always set boundaries for Aspyn,and hold her to them.

Especially during her teen years, this is when you will need to uphold your promise the most.

Daddy please pour half the the blue to represent your promise to aspyn,

to always put her well being first,

and to be her primary parent when she is in your home.

Vincent**Aspyn is your responsibility,

Aspyn did not get to to chose her path and her people, always remember that

Vincent you have chosen to spend the rest of your life with alysse,

alysse you have chosen to spend the rest of your life with Vincent.

This does not mean you take on each others responsibilities, past, Present, or future

especially the big ones,

it means you now share these things together,

by supporting each other and sharing each others life, past, Present and future.

Together the 3 of you will now pour the remaining sands,

to represent your promise to share your lives,

the good, the bad, and the ugly.

Pink Aspyn do you promise to love Leecy with aaaaallllll your big girl heart forever and ever

Purple alysse do you promise to love aspyn with aaaaallllll your big girl heart forever and ever

Grey Alysse do you promise

on the grayest cloudiest days when life is foggy

To provide all of these and keep the blackout as it is now

We will conclude this family ceremony with a big family bear hug

Return aspyn to her place

Sand ceremony

To symbolize this union and the importance of the individuals within the marriage,

two separate colors of sand will be combined

Gray, representing you, ALYSSE and all that you were, all that you are and all that you will ever be.

The blue, representing you, VINCENT and all that you were, all that you are and all that you will ever be.

As you each hold your separate containers of sand, they represent your lives up to this moment,

that even though you are coming together in marriage,

you two are still unique and capable individuals on your own.

Alysse, -{when I say}- start pouring around half of the sand from your vessel.

Once she is done, Vincent, start pouring about half of yours.

(Repeat this process until both of you only have a third of your

original amount of sand. -Taking turns or pouring all at once)

As these two containers of sand are poured into the third container,

they are joined together as one.

although you will be sharing one life,

never forget that you are two separate people.

Cherish and affirm your differences.

Together you will grow, sometimes together, sometimes separately.

The life that each of you have experienced until now, individually,

will hereafter be inseparably united

WHITE SAND>>>>>>>

-->> the part where they added their future children was 1. At 1st it was an argument, we talked long and hard I reminded them that it can cause resentment. The end was 3 total including grooms daughter 2. They were tired of family members asking how many children and 3. it was hilarious he poured Aspyn, bride poured 1, he tried taking bottle away, she called groomsmen to cover grooms eyes as she added the 3rd child.

Vincent { When I say} pour in white sand to represent Aspyn.

Once he is done, Alysse, pour in white sand to represent any future children you want to have together

Repeat this process back and forth until you have a whiteboard, to represent each child you wish to bring into your marriage

blend

What is joined here today is unique unto itself

and blending can never again be duplicated.

Vincent & Alysse now seal the union with your sand

it surrounds your past, present & future

in an environment of unconditional love.

While leaving a small amount of sand in each container

to symbolize that although you are now joined as one,

you each remain individuals.

Head back to your places

PLEASE BOW YOUR HEADS WHILE WE BLESS THIS UNION TODAY

We pray for you today, that your lives together be longer

than the time it would take to separate the individual grains of sand.

May you each be shelter to the other, may you be warmth to the other.

May there be no more loneliness,

for each of you will be companion to the other.

Now you are two bodies, but there is one life before you.

And may your days be good and long upon the earth

We pray for you to have a happy, loving,

and understanding home,

and for your circumstances to be fortunate.

AMEN

(GET HYPED UP>>>>>>>>>>)

Exchange of Rings

NOW QUICKLY, Present the rings…quick before they depreciate in value even more!

This is the point in the ceremony when people talk about the wedding bands being a perfect circle,

having no beginning and no end.

But we all know that these rings have a beginning.

Rock is dug up from the earth.

Metals are liquefied in a furnace at a thousand degrees.

The hot metal is forged, cooled, and then painstakingly polished.

Something beautiful made from raw elements.

Love is like that.

It comes from humble beginnings, made by imperfect beings.

It is the process of making something beautiful

where there was once nothing at all.

The promises which you have spoken to each other today

are inscribed forever in your minds, in your hearts.

But words are fleeting

Rings are circles, so are donuts, hula hoops and trampolines.

What I’m trying to say is let these rings,

not only be a symbol of your love for one another

but also a reminder to be sweet, have fun and make sure

to jump on trampolines every once in a while, together.

let these rings serve as a reminder of the feelings

you have in your hearts at this very moment.

(Long pause for them to reflect)

--> this mock me part was funny because he's like that and I am his mom.

{Mock me}

Now, Repeat after me:

Vincent, with this ring I am giving you my promise / to always love you / all the days of my life. Today I chose to take you

Alysse, with this ring I am giving you my promise / to always love you / all the days of my life.

Alysse and Vincent from this moment forward you will never be alone.

You will carry with you the love of another person,

May your life together be immersed in love and excitement.

May you strive to enrich each other in every possible way.

And may you work to bring the peace you find to this world.

Pronouncement

My hope for you is this:

To love yourself, truly love yourself,

You’ll discover your personal courage, self-respect, integrity, and self-esteem.

>When you don’t really like yourself,

ask your spouse to help guide you back to your full being

Some words of wisdom

A good marriage must be created.

In marriage the "little" things are the big things.

It is never being too old to hold hands.

It is remembering to say, ”I love you" at least once a day.

It is never going to sleep angry, stay up and fight

It is standing together and facing the world.

It is speaking words of appreciation, and demonstrating gratitude in thoughtful ways.

It is having the capacity to forgive and forget.

It is giving each other an atmosphere in which each can grow.

It is a common search for the good and the beautiful.

It is not only marrying the right person -- it is being the right partner

May you have many long years to delight in each other’s company,

and to love and be loved by the friends and family who have

come here today to support you.

>May you make a home together that is at once sheltering and welcoming.

>May you each do meaningful, productive work at home and in the world, learning from your failures and growing in your accomplishments.

>Both of you striving for success and teaching your children the same.

>May life’s challenges be met together with courage and optimism,

and may your days be filled with laughter, imagination,

trust, friendship, and love.

Kiss

--> they don't like pda, so I actually worded this more to the moment and had guests eyes on me while they had their moment-->

 “Now, wait, this is it, ya’ll!

The last chance to change your minds the deal is almost final!

Everyone ready? (pause)

KISS WHEN I SAY

Well, I guess there’s only one thing left to do,

and that’s for me to do my part!



By the authority vested in me by American Marriage Ministries and the State of Wisconsin i now pronounce you husband and wife."

Well! You're married!

You may now exchange cooties. As is tradition.

Well, go on, kiss!

TO GUESTS

"Let's Clap for The Start Of their Marriage!"

>__________________________>__________________________

GIVE DIRECTIONS>>>>>>>>>> AS RECESSIONAL BEGINS

Or can I have it in beginning

--> we did this while I walked out

CLOSING STATEMENT

Do in beginning?

Well folks, that wraps up the (clears throat)

“formal” portion of today’s proceedings.

Vincent and Alysse will greet you in the hall,

before we all meet at the Dinner at 4).

On behalf of Vincent and Alysse I’d like to thank you for coming.

Now let’s get out of here and get on with the party!

Recessional

This is the part where the wedding party walks down the aisle and takes their places in the line

How are they going out?

_____________________________________________________________________

SONG:__________________________________

ALYSSE & VINCENT  TAKE ASPYN?___________________________

ASPYN? DRENNAN?  _______________________________________

Dylan & Ann  ______________________________________________

Brett and Savannah  TAKE DRENNAN?_________________________

Nate & Harley ____________________________________________

Father & Mother of Bride  _______________________________________

Father & Mother of Groom  _______________________________________

OFFICIANT  _______________________________________

USHERS RELEASE GUESTS_______________________________________

______________________Collects everything from the Ceremony__________